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It starts off with the usual. I’m skipping to the good stuff.

We’ve had a chance to read your manuscript (any letter that doesn’t start off with “We love it. We’ll take it.” is a bad sign), and we’ve discussed it with our review committee and many others in the publishing department. It is obvious you have invested a considerable amount of time and energy into this project (can you feel it coming). Our publishing schedule is quite competitive, however, and as we look carefully at all the issues involved in publication, we are forced to be extremely selective in our publishing decisions. Reluctantly (and here it comes!), we have concluded we are not in a position to pursue publishing (an alliteration! they just can’t help themselves!) this manuscript. (I’m pretty sure this part was part of a form letter.)

This rejection is certainly not about your ability to write. You are a very talented and we would encourage you to check out other publishers such as (names retracted). Information on all of them can be found (the rest is rather mundane).

All in all, a very nice rejection letter. (Kinda like being slain with an ornate sword. You’re still dead, but at least it was with something pretty. 🙂 ) Give me a few days to be miserable, drown myself in self-depreciation, and I’ll bounce back with a vengeance.

In the meantime, anyone wanna go shopping?

Amber Argyle
Author

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